Darwin award for a Hamilton car thief yesterday. Usual story: speeds off when the cops try and pull him over, cops stop chasing him the moment it becomes clear what a nutbar he is, he continues driving like a nutbar anyway and within a short distance smacks into something and meets a swift, violent death because of course he isn't wearing a seatbelt.
However, it's unusual in that a girl in the back of the car came out of it without injuries because she, suffering the testosterone shortage female humans are noted for, was wearing a seatbelt. 3News took the opportunity to urge car thieves to ensure their safety and always wear a seat belt (video from 4:30 in). I disagree - this is the exact opposite of a public service announcement.
On the offchance any young car thieves happen to read this, I urge them to reject 3News' advice. Wearing seat belts is for pussies who obey the law. The brave, thrillseeking car thief doesn't wear a seat belt while driving stupidly at high speed - it would make him less of a man. Are you a man or a girl? Don't put on any stupid fucking seat belt when stealing my car, or you're just a fag.
Now, that's a more appropriate public service announcement.
Baltimore now deserves its own post.
1 hour ago